Counselling for anger

Wanting to change how you handle anger is a good reason to come to counselling. You won't be judged for it.

Signs anger is causing problems

• You snap at people and regret it afterwards
• Small things set you off, especially when you're tired or stressed
• People around you seem careful or on edge
• You've damaged things, or come close to it
• You hold it in until it bursts out, or turn it on yourself
• Anger is causing trouble at work or at home

How anger builds

Anger usually follows a curve. Something sets it off, such as a remark, a delay or feeling ignored. Then it builds: your body heats up, your muscles tense and your thoughts speed up. At the peak, the flashpoint, it's very hard to think clearly. Afterwards it cools down, often leaving guilt or regret.

The easiest place to change course is during the build-up, before the flashpoint. Learning to notice your own early signs is a big part of the work.

What often sits underneath

Anger is often the feeling that shows, covering others that are harder to feel: hurt, fear, shame, or feeling powerless or disrespected. Stress, exhaustion, alcohol and old experiences can all make the fuse shorter.

What helps in the moment

• Notice your early signs: a hot face, clenched jaw, raised voice
• Take a break before the flashpoint. Say you'll come back, and when
• Breathe slowly, with the out-breath longer than the in-breath
• Come back to the conversation once your body has settled

How counselling helps

In sessions, we look at what sets your anger off, what happens in your body and your thoughts as it builds, and what sits underneath it. I draw on CBT for practical ways to catch it earlier, alongside space to talk about where it comes from.

If anger is mainly showing up in your relationship, you might find triggers in relationships useful too.

Counselling isn't a medical treatment and I can't promise an outcome.

Talk it through

I offer one-to-one counselling for anger in Barnsley. Individual sessions are £70 for 50 minutes, in private counselling rooms in a discreet town-centre location in Barnsley with free parking, or by video or telephone.

You can start with a free 10-minute phone intro, bookable at 12:00 or 12:30, Monday to Friday, or book a first session.

Book a free 10-minute callBook a first session

If your anger has frightened or hurt someone

If your anger has led to someone at home feeling frightened, or being hurt, please tell me at the first call so we can talk about the right support. If anyone is in immediate danger, call 999. The Respect Phoneline is for anyone worried about their own behaviour towards a partner or family. If you're on the receiving end of someone else's anger at home, the other lines below can help.